A private office with a door that can close.

A private office with a door that can close.

A private office with a door that can close.

A copy of Peopleware for every employee.

...

Well, you did ask for a fantasy.

You might be closer than you think: http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/1998-11-08/

I'll add:

Soundproofing. The best, reasonable cost version I encountered (in someone else's executive office) was expanding foam sprayed between the drywall surfaces. In this case, installed during construction -- I can't imagine it was that expensive to add.

A window admitting natural light.

I add this because I've had the experience of working in private rooms, but next to very loud/noisy people. Still miserable -- sometimes open space is better because the noise blends (a very limited form of better).

Using sound masking strategies in conjunction with sound isolation is typically preferable to sound isolation (e.g. a dripping faucet which keeps you awake).

Basically, a 6-8br+ luxury house ($5-15k/mo to rent) to start (since that seems like the cheapest way to get all the features I want); a commercial space (not class A office space, but a light industrial building or warehouse) could be retrofitted, but the tenant improvement budget would have to be high. I'd rather drop $10k/mo on a 6k sf house with 5 acre grounds vs. $5/ft3/mo for a 1000 sf office.

Parking onsite (behind a gate; outdoor is fine). I guess walking or shuttle to mass transit, but I drive.

Walking distance to restaurants is ideal, otherwise onsite catering, waiter.com, etc.

Bathrooms with showers.

Crash space.

Private offices which have entire walls which can open to common workspace.

Plenty of conference/meeting rooms in various sizes, with the ability to do complex video tasks easily (recording, streaming, teleconferencing, connecting ipads or phones or whatever to big screens)

Customized individual workstations (a base being laptop + desktop and 3 x 24" and 1 x 30", keyboard, mouse, aeron, big desk). No real need for conformity.

802.11n (well set up) and gig-e, with 100M WAN connectivity to colo and Internet. (gig-e better). Ability to put random desktop and lab ethernets on arbitrary VLANs with equipment in the colo.

Package/mail receiving service (for work and personal packages)

Non-stupid IT (basically, Facebook style) -- if you need something, and you can get it faster than the IT process, you buy it (and then IT gets to try to fix their own process); IT is there to speed things up, not save costs.

Stocked kitchen with drinks (I'd do unlimited free drinks no matter what; free food too if budget isn't an issue).

Individually adjustable climate control (multi-zone residential HVAC with louvers per room; spot coolers if you need more control.)

Great security (strong perimeter, and no one walking around unescorted; can leave $10k in cash sitting on your desk without fear if it being stolen, including by cleaning staff)

Fantasy, probably: Permissive carry policy onsite, onsite armory (maybe this is a fantasy...), onsite range (air is ok if residential, otherwise smallbore indoor would be awesome)

Swimming pool.

A typical house would require extensive retrofitting to meet the applicable codes (e.g. structural, egress, fire suppression, and accessibility) due to the change of occupancy - never mind zoning and other land use regulations.

For a small scale startup (where customers never visit -- not retail or legal/medical services), the only practical concern is neighbors, as far as I've seen. Maybe once you have 10-20 employees working onsite that changes (I've never done the villa-office thing in the US beyond 5-10 people).

Also, a lot of the larger homes actually are built to commercial standards, at least from what I've seen in listings, especially in seismic zones. Sprinklers and egress are what I primarily care about; non-ADA-compliance is only incidentally a concern (being able to move racks, furniture, etc. around is great, but I don't need every bathroom to be ADA compliant).

Zoning is an issue once neighbors complain (and usually, it's due to parking issues; having 20 cars street parked in a neighborhood is a big inconvenience to them) -- that's why you want a driveway with a gate. In general in Northern CA, the actual zoning people don't care about violations of home office -> office as long as it's not causing trouble for others -- there are numerous examples (Facebook, HP, ...) where homes have been used as offices. Not putting up signage, not having customers visit, etc. is generally enough from what I've seen.

My long term plan involves a ranch/farm/estate/country home in a no-code location, though.

Most larger homes are not built to comply with the building codes requirements of commercial structures (e.g. stairs: 100psf live, 42" guards, 1.25" diameter handrails, etc.) and the optimism embodied in real-estate listings is legendary.

Legally, pretty much everything must comply with ADA- and in California and several other states you can be sued for damages (though if you are in California and read the newspaper I suspect you have seen something about such cases).

Of course people do stuff illegally all the time - you could fill the house with grow lights and pot plants. But things have changed a bit in the 70 years since HP left the garage.

Stuff in decreasing order of importance:

2-3 monitors per room, with stands allowing them to mount longwise or wide.

Aeron Chairs (they're really that nice for long hours)

Adjustable Height Desks (manual is fine)

Rubberized floor mats (a la the grocery store)

Actual offices with walls and doors

Whiteboards

Lots of Zones of AC (as you grow, some parts of the floor will require tons more cooling to stay bearable. Once temperatures get out of a narrow range, a sizable minority of the population loses huge swaths of productivity from lack of concentration)

Coffee machine (1 touch, not barista style)

Coke Machine

Filtered Water dispenser (not bottled)

Dehumidifiers/Humidifiers for the AC system (you want a constant level in the midrange to not hurt equipment/cause mold yet keep everyone's sinuses/scalp not dry). It sounds silly, but it makes a huge difference for general health.

Someone whose primary job is catching all the ideas, initiatives and data that otherwise fall to the ground between people: implement them; run them to ground, or tee them up so someone more better suited can execute them.

Quiet.

Food.

Frisbee.

I think I'd love to have that job.

Forget the cafe-style espresso machine that requires you to manually froth milk for lattes etc. it leads to milk and time wastage. Go instead for a one-touch machine like the Jura X9. It is 95% as good as hand-making it yourself (assuming you know how to do it), but takes 30 seconds.

Run Cat5e/6 cables to each workstation. Although the latest wifi-n is great, in my experience nothing beats a fat, stable 1gbps lan cable at my desk - especially if you have local servers in the office or shared drives.

>Forget the cafe-style espresso machine that requires you to manually froth milk for lattes etc. it leads to milk and time wastage. Go instead for a one-touch machine like the Jura X9. It is 95% as good as hand-making it yourself (assuming you know how to do it), but takes 30 seconds.

Thanks for bringing that up. I hate all the time those damn things make people waste.

Check out SendLove.to's office in Los Angeles. They have an indoor treehouse, spa, neon sign and basketball hoop in their office. Yet, spent surprisingly little on it, doing almost everything themselves, and finding things like the spa and basketball hoop used.

http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.154502387938617.417...

I would have a rolling concave ceiling to project day/night scene with top of the line lighting. Ceiling high full back wall waterfall behind glass, the room will be free of humidity and dust with advanced a/c air-filtration. I would have multiple monitors on arms that can swivel and interlink. Also book/paper holding devices that can swivel into any location. Room will be soundproof with a lock. The server-wall would give me multiple operating systems with remote changing of systems from desk, with one keyboard/mouse. Besides my desk monitors, I will have one jumbo-screen projected on glass (partition for waterfall) that I can keep news and cheatsheets along with hacker news.I would have a very serious sound system. Lastly, I would have a love seat with a flow through fireplace (to see the big screen under the faux night scene). Btw, the glass partition will be the white board. I might add mist and light show on the other side as well if it looks too boring.

- Whiteboard in every office.

- Offices for everyone. With doors.

- A break room with several nice couches or arm chairs. At a previous employer it was great to work for 10 or 12 hours and be able to relax for a bit.

- Shower. Fewer people than you think will take advantage of this, but I, for one, like the ability to bike to work, and shower. Also for those 12-14 hour days a shower can be a real perk-me-up.

Things you should not install but that I have seen. This predated the dot-com boom, and was from the S+L mess. Before he got sent to jail a guy in Dallas made a huge fortune and built his dream office building. Ten years later we moved in.

- Small dance floor.

- Murphy bed in the boss office suite.

- A multi-level living area suite (kitchen, bedrooms, living rooms, four car garage) reachable from inside the main office suite, but cunningly built so you could not tell from the outside it was there.

Okay the last item _was_ rather keen.

Here's some ideas off the top of my head:

+ Private office

+ Private bathroom

+ Aeron chair

+ Dell Ultrasharp 27" LCD

+ High quality headphones

+ Mechanical keyboard

+ Nice big desk

+ Quality drinks

+ Natural lighting

+ Good artificial lighting

+ Convenient parking

+ Lunch/dinner delivery

+ Private sofa/hammock for naps

I want a mechanical keyboard but without a private office to go with it, my cofounder would kill me.

might help:

http://elitekeyboards.com/products.php?sub=access,slpads

+ stacked kitchen

Keep your interior design clean and simple. You never know when you will need to move. Give everyone private offices to maximize concentration. Layout those offices to allow as many as possible to have natural sunlight. Carefully choose office furniture to prevent RSI. Fill your space the plants from the TED video. http://www.ted.com/talks/kamal_meattle_on_how_to_grow_your_o...

A very large dry-erase board in every office - a nice one made out of tempered glass.

Variable height desk.

A window in every office.

Even though I do not own or desire a pet, I do appreciate places that are tolerant of their presence.

For the whiteboard it sounds like you currently have no whiteboards in every office. The glass ones are nice, but expensive. If they wont even give you whiteboards go to Home Depot and picked up a 4x8 sheet of bathroom melamine for $16. You now have a whiteboard _wall_

Dogs in offices are just a nuisance, come on.

Clearly a pair of these are necessary: http://www.voidaudio.com/product_detail.asp?id=42

You know you want to. I mean, look at them. They're made of kevlar for god's sake!

And these plots should speak for themselves:

http://www.voidaudio.com/pdf/plots/Air%20Motion%20Plot.pdf

If I was looking to move into a new office space, I would strive to hire an architect of the sort who designs buildings and would start with the exercise of architectural programming (essentially writing the specification for the design). Poor design decisions early on are like poor code - pernicious and painful to fix.

Mad Men style: a bar, couple of couches and a good looking admin assistant outside. :) Seriously though, just a couch and an adjustable-height desk will do.

A new foosball table!

best answer yet ;)

Corner desk (if private office is not an option), large dual monitors, whiteboard, Aeron chair, height-adjustable desk, little lounger for PM naps...

A ping pong table. I'd like that.

Also, private offices with windows for everyone, and large shared spaces, including a place to have meals together.

Every desk has flexible arms with dual monitors

Linux

We're on windows xp

Idea Paint on every wall.

A door.

a fishtank wall