I fundamentally agree with the basic insight of this essay, but I'd like to add that we should strive to be those friends to each other so we don't need to "auto-sympathize" to such a degree. If the people that you value don't value you for how hot your girlfriend is, or how much money you make, then you won't feel the compulsion to build yourself up that way--to such a degree. Of course, the pervading culture still makes it difficult to ignore those sirens.
And of course, social media plays a huge role in this reduction of the complexity of emotional life to more superficial things, to what can fit in a camera lens or a blurb.
The kind of self-esteem that people have, I imagine, must be like malnourished populations that are also obese. They don't have any lack of social interaction quantitatively, but they're still emotionally/spiritually hungry.
We only spend so much time with our friends, while we talk to ourselves all the time, mostly in very unfriendly manner.
This self talk is the basis of Default Mode Network and you can start to notice it after a couple days of total silence.
Great friends are great, obviously, but we also need to internalise them.
And of course, social media plays a huge role in this reduction of the complexity of emotional life to more superficial things, to what can fit in a camera lens or a blurb.
The kind of self-esteem that people have, I imagine, must be like malnourished populations that are also obese. They don't have any lack of social interaction quantitatively, but they're still emotionally/spiritually hungry.